Life on board a sailing yacht and in the harbours offers many a bizarre encounter. Author Steffi von Wolff tells us in her commentary"Wolff's territory" regularly talks about her experiences as an on-board woman. Not always meant seriously, often satirically exaggerated, but always with a lot of heart and a wink.
Have fun finding presents!
What could be nicer than making people you love happy? Well, almost nothing.
Fortunately, it's just the right time of year, everyone is thinking about which Christmas present would suit whom, and there are so many marvellous things that make eyes light up when beautifully wrapped. Since I've been spending more and more time with water people, i.e. for over 20 years now, my gift-giving heart rejoices when it can look out for new maritime delights.
Unfortunately, none of my friends have a party cellar that looks like the "Haifischbar" in Hamburg. Of course, such a cellar should have fishing baubles, which nobody really needs, but everyone who likes maritime things does, right? So not just the cellar people. Of course there has to be a singing fish on the wall, singing "Don't worry, be happy" and swinging its tail and fins to the beat. Golden portholes, hemp ropes wrapped in fairy lights and, of course, a captain's cap round off the gift ensemble.
I found something very stylish online yesterday. A shoehorn with an anchor handle. One day my friends will reach an age when they will be grateful for a shoehorn and then it will be my time!
Oh, how I love that.
Of course, it can also be less kitschy. For example, you can give a boat owner personalised notebooks with his and the boat's name. It looks classy. Incidentally, a well-known manufacturer is currently running a special offer week: Printing free of charge! I would be happy to pass on the information.
Kitchen towels and bath towels are also really nice, all beautifully embroidered with the name of the boat and often with the coordinates of the home port or the location of the last summer holiday.
Personally, I would also like to equip our boat with a knot board and a bell, but I was told that "there are limits". Unfortunately, this also applies to T-shirts with funny slogans. How marvellous! What you could have printed on them: "Mumbling skipper", "Husband sailing along", "Impatient explainer", "I'm still learning" or "I was left behind in the harbour". Wonderful!
I myself once received a very unusual maritime gift: the man I'm still married to made me a kind of charm bracelet. It had lots of little things on it that had broken on the boat, including a shackle, a pawl, a small block, three cotter pins and a few bolts. Not everyone has them. You don't need wi... never mind.
A ring with a nice gemstone from the region where you sailed in summer isn't bad either. Or pea-shaped earrings from the pea islands near Bornholm, if you've been there.
The most unusual things are usually the most beautiful.
Under no circumstances, however, would I give away things that have what I call a "touristy, maritime connection". A "shitty weather pot" or tops and bags with "Küstenkind" printed on them. The very worst: sea word obscenities.
Wooden boards with the words "Meer geht immer" or "Ich will Meer" printed on them. I once saw a salt shaker that said "More salt" and I think they made a mistake. You can take it even further with a print on a mug or shirt: "Now I'm here in the Mediterranean and have no more resources".
And who actually likes these decorative figures in which terracotta seagulls with wide open eyes and legs on stilts that are far too long look like little idiots and/or wear hats and scarves? Or crying seals peering out of money boxes?
Many sailors are also happy to receive practical and unusual gifts. A friend of mine gave her husband a voucher for a bow thruster for Christmas. An acquaintance gave his wife a steam cooker, also for the boat. My husband received a painting from his brother-in-law and co-owner, showing the boat and my husband sailing. Oil on acrylic. Looks great. And it's something very special.
However, you also need to know which type of sailor you are giving a gift to. Giving a twelve-piece pot set and a cast-iron pan to a thoroughbred regatta sailor with a boat with a correspondingly minimalist interior is just as unlikely to go down well as a gift voucher for a solid wooden door to close the loo. Teak deckchairs for the foredeck are not the right choice either. Neither are bicycles.
What I think always works: something with carbon or where it says carbon on it. Sure, a carbon mainsail isn't something you can pay for out of petty cash, but there are other nice things: reading glasses with carbon frames, toothpaste with carbon (it's black, of course), carbon scrubs, customisable writing sets with a carbon look and even an eau de toilette from Prada called Carbon. When I no longer needed them after a foot operation, I gave my husband my carbon insole as a gift. He was as happy as a child and used it to make washers for Padeyes on the foredeck. Not everyone has them.
The absolute no-go for me, however, is to give away something from this one brand that is marketed by an ageing, white-toothed, permanently grinning producer and singer. They say "Expedition by sea and air", "Shipyard" or "Authentic Nautical" on them.
I'd rather not give anything away at all. Although that would be really difficult for me.
Happy gift finding!
